Crying, feeling broken, tired, exhausted, lonely, fragile, sensitive, anxious, nervous, panicking.
I don’t understand. Everyone says they care, but they don’t. You can verbally say something and not mean it. You can mentally think something and not do it. No one cares. I’m not sure if it’s just me not opening up to people or if it’s just people saying things they don’t mean. Don’t tell me you care, don’t tell me you love me, don’t tell me you’re here for me, in fact don’t tell me anything at all if you don’t mean it. It’s better if you just don’t tell me anything at all because then I won’t expect anything out of you. I won’t expect anything out of anyone. Then I’ll be able to handle myself by myself. I wouldn’t be on medication or I wouldn’t be dependent on other people because I wouldn’t expect anything. I wouldn’t expect people to act a certain way. I’d probably be happier. I’d probably be healthier.
I was at a low point yesterday. I just wanted to escape. I wanted to just runaway and never come back. I wanted to disappear. But I’m here… And the reason why I’m here is because I remember going to so much worse and getting through it… I knew I’d be okay. I know I’ll be happy eventually. It may not be today, tomorrow, in a week, a month, or a year, but I will be happy some day.